Being Present is talked about a lot in our current culture. This blog is dedicated to examining all the layers and subjects related to being present. Defining it is not easy because it is a mental and physical process. One of the ways to understand what is preventing us from being more present in our lives, is to know what causes us NOT to be present.
Because being present is related to our mental awareness, you have to examine the things that affect the mind that takes you out of a present state. A mental process is anything that is related to how your mind works. The mind has many functions but for this discussion your thinking process can be basically broken down into two actions.
The first action are the mental functions that happen automatically without conscious thought or a conscious intervention. These are things our bodies do to keep us alive like, keeping your heart beating and your lungs breathing. Emotions are designed to protect us. Your fear responses happen very fast as our minds and bodies work together to keep us from harm. Habits are created when we perform repetitive tasks. Habits are also created when we have similar emotional responses. These habits help the brain to perform repetitive tasks in the background, so we are not overwhelmed with all the activities we engage in every day.
The next mental function is the actions you perform that are related to your conscious thoughts. These are the times when we think about a subject, plan for a future event, engage in some type of creative work and imagine about the goals we want to accomplish. When we are in control of our thoughts, we are able to be in a present state of mind. In this state you are able to examine your thoughts and know that you are the one having these thoughts. In this present mental state, you are in full control of your actions.
Not being present happens when the automatic part of our mental process takes over the conscious thinking process. So instead of being able to view and examine our thoughts, these thoughts are on autopilot and the related emotions are activated without our control. In this state we just go through the motions of the activity we are engaged in and cannot connect with the current experience and just react (usually in a negative way) without mental presence.
I will talk more about what not being present looks like, but simply put if you are not in control of your thoughts and believe that you are what you think you become identified with your uncontrolled thoughts. You will read many times in my blog that our thoughts are a tool we use, not who we are. We are our consciousness, the awareness of our aliveness.
What are the automatic mental processes that take over our minds and STOP us from being present? These are the mental processes that are related to fear and protection. The mental process that creates habits can also make a habit of thoughts and feelings that we experience on a regular basis. Instead of being aware of our emotions, we have habitual emotional reactions that happen without our control. Like all habits, we perform the thoughts and emotions with out much consciousness. Most of the time NOT being present is the way we cope with negative feelings and experiences or triggers from past traumas.
Below are some examples of things that will cause us not to be present.
Traumas
Childhood fearful experiences.
Suffering a loss in life as a child or adult.
Accidents to the body or traumatic emotional events we experience as a child or as an adult.
Fears
Events in our lives that made us feel afraid or insecure.
Being abandoned emotionally or physically as a child.
Survivor of an event that devastated the person or family.
Life
Recurring negative experiences from our childhood and into adulthood
Stuck in a mourning state from something you lost (death, relationship, safety)
This is a small list of things that we may have experienced and have not fully healed from. You can see from the list that no one is spared from having experiences that make us feel unsafe, afraid, or un-loved. So, if you have had these types of things happen in your life and you feel you have emotions that you cannot control, you may have a challenge being in a present state. The paradox is that to heal from these past traumas, we have to be in a present state, but our pains keep us locked and NOT present.
There is hope because there are things we can do mentally and physically to become more present. I will discuss this in future blog entries.
Peace and BEE Present!!
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